Making the wrong decision?

Many people ask if they are making the right decision.


So do you follow what your logical brain is telling you

or do you follow your instincts ?


With following what my last post said.

I don’t know what to do with this job offer.


And it’s due to the fact that I’m afraid of making the wrong decision. 


My mind and my instincts are pulling me in two different directions.

My mind is saying that the job offer is only paying a couple of dollars more than my current job, but I work hard and deserve a pay rate that is more.

My instincts keep pulling me back to the job and wanting to know more and more about it. It tells me that it is a school that brings me back to what my education and degree taught me. It’s a school where I can provide my own ideas for the classroom, which is completely new.

So which way do I go?

I don’t know what the future holds for me.

& with having anxiety and depression, the future f*cking scares me.

It doesn’t help when others try to give me advice. Like telling me that working at a place 40 mins away that pays $7 more will be worth it. Or texting me links to job opportunities.

They just f*ck with my mind more. 

So my mind in the past week has been back and forth between what my brain is telling me and what my instincts are telling me.

And other external opinions affecting me.

Basically, it’s just been sh*tty.

But then as I was typing this blog post and being pulled in different directions at the same time,

this saying popped into my head

“everything happens for a reason” 

& then my mind stopped itself  from chaos and it  just felt like time froze around me.

I used to say that quote all the time. Whenever I was in the phase of deep depression, I would say this to myself to reassure myself that everything will be okay.

& when it popped back into my head, it was like being reunited with an old best friend.

Haven’t seen each other for years, but it still feels like the good old times.

And I feel like this quote came into my mind at the right time.

No matter what happens, “EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON”.

Even though this current job has increased my anxiety, I worked here because it gave me the opportunity of working with my amazing co-teacher. We worked together for a year and one month and the way we work together feels like we worked together for 10 years.

Whatever decision I make will happen for a reason.

Just go with your instincts.


Everything happens for a reason.




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