I’m Trying My Best.

I am not sure which year was worse 2020 or 2021 (and we’re only in March).

I’m not shocked at the things that have happened to me, but I am disappointed.

Every time I try to be positive and just deal with the things that have come my way.

Life hits me with another obstacle.

This week was hard. My uncle passed away from COVID. My heart hurts for my family. My heart hurts for my aunt, my cousins and my cousin’s kids.

Work already has been difficult and I’ve already felt so burnt out.

And going to work already burnt out WITH MY heart hurting for my family was soo difficult.

But I had no choice but go to work.

I had so many obstacles come my way in the past year & I just have to deal with it.

And it’s so hard.

I’m tired of dealing with difficult moments that have happened in the past year and are continuing to happen.

Moments that have knocked me down physically, mentally and emotionally. I’ve had so many journal posts that begin with “This has been a rough week….”

And I’m so tired of hard weeks. And I have to deal with it because there’s nothing I can do.

I have to constantly pretend that I’m ok, I have to “stick it out” and just go on with life with all the sh*t that has come my way.

I’m so tired.

I’m trying my best & I am constantly getting hit with these obstacles. Sometimes it comes when I’m not recovered yet from the previous obstacles.

I’m trying my best to be positive.

I’m trying my best to work when I feel like sh*t.

I’m trying my best.

I’m trying.

-MEL

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